Random Thought:Beauty

Why do guys look better natural (plain faced, sans make-up, etc) than women?

Carol’s Daughter “Diversity” Rant

I know I’m late on this but I felt compelled to say something about this new ad Carol’s Daughter recently released showing “Beauty in Diversity” with the company’s new ambassadors: model Selita Ebanks, singer Solange Knowles, and  singer (?) ahem, diddy’s girl aka Misa Hylton-Brim/J. Lo hybrid and Delia’s model Cassie Ventura .

According to Steve Stoute, Carol’s Daughter chairman and lead investor:

“What we’re doing now is moving into a polyethnic space. We want to be the first beauty brand that truly captures the beauty of the tapestry of skin types in America. When I say polyethnic, I mean women who are made up of several ethnicities. If you ask them what they are, they’re going to use a lot of different words to describe themselves. That’s in line with the Census data coming out — people are checking much more than two boxes. We believe we’ve put together a shoot that celebrates many different ethnicities, to become a mirror of what America’s really becoming.[...]“They will serve as cultural ambassadors in bringing forth this acceptance that the definition of beauty is now colorless. There are no longer boxes of white, black, Latina, Asian. More and more women are checking the other box, they share the vision and embody the messaging in their attitude, appearance, projects and core values.”

As far as the ethnicities being represented by the ad, Cassie is African-American, Mexican and Filipina, Selita is Native American, Irish, and African-American, and Solange is African-American and French Creole.

 

Selita goes on to say:

“Carol’s Daughter doesn’t have just one direct demographic. Solange’s hair is a different texture than mine; so is Cassie’s. Our skin and body types are different. Today, people are blended, and I think the three of us are a prime example. Women in my family range from vanilla to the deepest chocolate.”

I’ve read a good amount of comments made by people about this ad on various blogs and the consensus is that people are not satisfied.

 

My take on this?  I as well, am not satisfied.  While I appreciate Steve Stout and Lisa Price’s message in their new campaign, it doesn’t paint the picture of diversity. Sure Solange, Cassie, and Selita are all made up of different ethnicities, but unfortunately the picture of the three of them together doesn’t exactly spell out diversity.  To me, their ethnic diversity is more internal than external. From a consumer’s perspective, you cannot tell that Selita and Cassie are made up of multiple nationalities, just by looking at them in this ad. Shoot, even to me, as an african-american woman, also being a similar shade to the three of them, I don’t see a vast difference and either of the women, nor do I SEE the diversity. And sorry, but Cassie’s colored contacts do nothing to show to the ethnic diversity they are attempting to portray.

 

Problem #1

What are they advertising here? Stout claims that he wants the brand to be the first to “capture the beauty of the tapestry of skin types in America”. But what does that really mean?  Then he goes on to say that many women are using more than one ethnicity to describe their racial background. That’s great and all, but what does that really have to do with the tapestry of skin types he speaks of? To me, he is only showing one skin color in the ad. There’s no dark skinned or brown skinned multi-ethnic women of color in this ad and I don’t see a variety or even a “diverse” melting pot of skin types. And whether or not Selita is a different race from Solange, this ad doesn’t show that. I know they are different ethnicities because I follow black entertainment and pop culture but really, what average consumer is going to know that their ethnicities vary or even do the research to find the ethnic differences between the three women if they don’t know? You might as well place Keri Hilson and Beyonce in an ad and show ”diversity”. I can find more diversity in “My Black is Beautiful”, or GAP, or United Colors of Benetton ads.

 

Selita goes on to say that the women in her family range in a plethora of skin tones ranging “from vanilla to the deepest chocolate.” So instead of this ad showing women that support what she says, it actually makes it even more apparent that the range of skin tone is what’s lacking.

 

Problem #2

Carol’s Daughter is a full fledged bath and body/hair care line, so assuming they have different target audiences, who are they trying to attract-haircare customers or those who buy their bath and body products? Selita speaks about how her hair is different from the Solange’s and Cassie’s, so I’m assume they are reaching out to their hair customers. But then she goes on to talk about skin tone, so maybe both? We all know that one’s skin tone has nothing to do with determining their hair type, so who knows….Maybe they are trying to attract all the multi-ethnic brown women of the world?- But then again, isn’t that who their targeted audience has been since the start of their company? 

 

What is not clear is their focus, in addition to how they are actually successfully embodying their theme of diversity through this ad.  And from an advertising perspective, I’d have to wonder if a woman of a darker skin tone who may or may not be of multiple ethnicities, could relate to this ad? Would she be more motivated to buy Carol’s Daughter without seeing anyone that looks similar to her in this ad?

 

Honestly I doubt it. When it comes to advertising with a theme, things need to be clear for the consumer. The picture of diversity has NOT been painted. To someone who doesn’t know Selita’s, Solange’s, and Cassie’s background, this ad would just look like Carol’s Daughter’s new ambassadors are 3 light skinned black women- yes I said it. And that is their main mistake. It should not be required for a consumer to have to do research to get a complete understanding of a company’s point of view. point-blank-period.

 

Interested on seeing what Selita, Cassie, and Solange have to say about “good hair”? Click here for a link to their video response with Lisa Price. I will add that Jada Pinkett-Smith and Mary J. Blige are still ambassadors for Carol’s Daughter. If this new ad had included them, it is then that I believe ”Beauty in Diversity” would’ve been more of a cohesive theme.

 

Any thoughts? Agree or disagree?

I’m Feelin It: Twin Talk

This is hee-larious, too cute for words, and absolutely “intreeging” to say the least:

I truly believe they can understand each other. But I wonder what the heck they are saying? I’m thinking it’s a debate like…..

Baby with 1 sock: “If you can show me the secret hand signal, I will show where the ice cream is”

Other baby: “If you show me where the ice cream is, I’ll show you where your other sock is..”

LOL.

Wedding Crashing

It’s been a long time since I’ve gone to a wedding. The last time I went to a wedding was six years ago! But I love going to weddings. What’s not to love- you get a chance to dress up, watch two people in love exchange vows, then go off to party the night away with free dinner, cake, champagne at the reception. Yes, I’m a sucker for free cake and champagne…who isn’t?

Okay, you are probably going to think the rest of this post is one big joke but I’m serious…My friend and I have an idea that this summer that we are going wedding crashing. You have read correctly.  No one I know is getting married and I want to go to a wedding, so hey, why not take matters into my own hands…right?

Crashing a wedding or two is not only a task on my bucket list, I feel it can also be a beneficial practice for my acting career in more ways than one. Going to a place you don’t belong and acting like you do, is a facade that a lot of people can’t pull off, and let’s just say that it’s a facade that I need to work on.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve crashed parties before, but I think a party is on the “Easy Level” when it comes to crashing an event. People usually don’t keep track of who is invited, and if you look the part of someone who belongs, then it’s a heck of a lot easier to get in. Because of the meticulous planning, invites, seating chart at the reception, and most importantly: familiarity of those invited, I can imagine a wedding being harder to crash,

The movie “Wedding Crashers” does serve as inspiration. And I know we should probably watch the movie a few times more and take notes before we go out and do the damn thing, but I’m thinking maybe we should start on a smaller scale. We should hit up family reunions first….straight up Janet Jackson and Regina King “Poetic Justice” style.

I can never forget how they all rolled up in the mail truck on the scene like it was nothing.

Check out the crashing at the 5:20 mark.

Mind you, there were so many people at that family reunion, it would’ve been hard to discover someone not actually being related. But maybe this is the route I need to start off with, and then graduate to the “Intermediate Level” of crashing weddings depending on my confidence level. Starting with crashing some picnics at Central Park and working our way up…hmmm I will see.. :-p

Have you ever crashed an event (someone’s wedding, picnic, party, etc)? If so, how did you do it successfully? If you were unsuccessful, how did you get caught?

Hair Boredom/Hair Rant

I’m 14 months post relaxer and am done. I’m tired of doing my hair, tired of detangling, tired of moisturizing, tired of styling, fixing, primping, and tired of bantu knotting. I could switch up my style and try twist and curls, braid outs, pin curls, and what not, but I don’t want to…I’m just plain TIRED.

It’s times like these where I see why girls shave their heads.

Times like these I wish I could pull off a hairstyle like this...Easy, breezy, beautiful, Amber Rose

With a  bald head the only thing that can make you late in the morning is figuring out what to wear. You never have to worry about your hair (or lack of) getting messed up while you sleep. You never have to worry about rain wetting it, or if the wind blows it back the wrong way. Detangling sessions are extinct. It’s the epitome of “wash and go”….It’s just simple.

The only times I’ve had to experience these wonderful pleasures is when I’ve had cornrows or braids with extensions in the past. And as much as I loved rocking cornrows, in my book, they are really out of style. And as far as micro braids go, they aren’t my cup of tea, as I cannot fathom sitting for hours on end getting them put in and spending even more time taking them out.

And going bald? Ehh kind of out of the question for me. First of all, I have no hook (i.e. curvature in the back of my head). And secondly if I did decide to shave my head, I know as soon as that last strand of hair hits the ground I would either:

a) bawl my eyes out

and/or

b) miss my hair immediately

I honestly tip my hat off to any girl who shaves her head. It’s a big deal. But the closest I’ve come to wanting to shave my head is wanting to cut my hair short like a Halle Berry/Kelis/Rihanna. And I never did it because I didn’t think the cut would fit with my face since my head is big..lol.

But I digress.

I am to the point where I’m pretty much blogged out. Blogged out meaning tired of scouring natural hair blogs for the next new thing I can learn about hair that I don’t even have yet. I’m tired of looking at product reviews of products that I probably won’t buy. And I dare to say that I am actually tired of looking at Youtube hair videos <gasp! shocker>

I kind of want to go on a hair hiatus until my BC date comes around. I’ve been longing for kinky twists or a nice curly weave like Kelly Rowland used to wear.

I love this look! Someone send me this hair pronto!/hairisbest.com

I’ve already decided to ditch buying any more hair products until my BC date (unless I run out of the products I like). I just don’t know how many more conditioners and sprays I can use! I will just use what’s been working for me…there’s absolutely no reason to change my regime to “find what my hair likes” when I’m cutting the majority of my hair off in a matter of months.

Hair hiatus will “probably, maybe” begin AFTER a new venture I’ve decided to embark on which is Youtubing.

Okay, okay yes you did read correctly/And yes I was just complaining about being tired of watching videos…but not actually making them.

There’s not a lot of transitioning videos on the net so I thought I could help bring some more. As soon as I get my camera set up and actually figure out what I’m doing, it’s on and poppin’.

SIDE NOTE: I will continue blogging about my own hair experiences. I have not gotten tired of that

A Confession

I

am

a

Yes I would mind if you joined me.../jacuzzikillers.com

LONER.

No, but seriously I am and I am not one bit ashamed or embarrassed about it.

Okay so let me explain. I’m not the type of loner that doesn’t have friends and is just anti-social. I’m like the type that has friends and sometimes chooses to be anti-social.

Don’t get me wrong. I love hanging out with my good friends, cracking jokes, and making memories. A LOT of the most fulfilling times in my life were ones that included my friends and I, so me saying this is not to discredit or ignore the great impact they have on my livelihood (and when it comes to relationships, this is also not to say that I’d prefer to be single!).

I just know that I am a loner and enjoy being one.

I LOVE shopping by myself. I love spending as much or little time in a store as I want to. Without pressure to spend or not spend my money. Roaming aisles freely without a care in the world.

And though I’m not doing this currently, I LOVE living by myself. I can walk around with minimal clothing whenever I please. And there’s nothing better than coming back my house after a long day and everything is exactly the way I left it. When I clean my space, it only gets messy when I mess it up.  I never have to worry about someone else’s vision of a mess being messier than my own. Guests come when I want them to and DON’T overstay their welcome. The condition of my things are just as good as I keep them. . And nothing competes with spending as much time in the bathroom as I need to handle all my business without having to worry about someone interrupting me.

I LOVE being by myself.  Alone with my thoughts.  Doing my thing, whatever that may be. Not answering to anyone but myself.

I remember going to the movies by myself for the first time ever a few years ago. I went to go see “Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist”.

allmoviephoto.com

And let me tell you I enjoyed every minute of it. Not just because I was alone, but because it was a good movie. I had always wanted to go to the movies alone at least once to see what it would be like, and the experience didn’t disappoint.

And I’ve always wanted to do the whole Eat, Pray, Love ”backpacking in Europe” thing by myself. I have this thought that going away to a foreign place alone is one of the best ways of getting to know yourself. There is no one around that you know that can judge you, and you are in a completely new element with only yourself to rely on. It’s like a way of starting fresh with yourself.

I don’t know if me saying that I was raised as an only child is explanation enough for this confession. My older siblings didn’t live in the same house as me so I was only surrounded by kids in my age range when I was in school or after school playing outside. And despite having a plethora of friends, there were several things that I had to go through by myself. My parent’s divorce was one huge event I went through alone. Another thing, which was a result of that event, was moving across the country away from everything I knew in my world.

So, in a way, there have been times where I feel I’ve had to rely on myself to get through hard situations in my life. There were times were I had to be my own best friend. Which is probably why I have no qualms with being by myself. I can 100% guarantee that I have my back. And there aren’t many people you can say that about in your life.

Not everyone can appreciate nor handle being by themselves for long periods of time.  And quite honestly I think that’s a bit sad. Just as much as it’s important to have people in your circle that enrich your life, it’s just as important to find serenity in solitude. It’s healthy. I think one of the most powerful aspects in my life is being at peace within the comfort of my own company. And that’s something I definitely don’t take it for granted.

All Black Everything

Haven’t posted on my nails <AGAIN> in a minute. I promise I will do better….so after the nude I decided to do a darker shade. Check it below:

Yes it’s black but it doesn’t really give off the goth vibe. It’s covered with silver sparkles so that makes the polish look like more of a deep, deep charcoal and definitely changes it up.

Here’s what I used:

• Sinful Colors polish in Secret Admirer
• NK Fast Dry Top Coat

Me likey!

Long Term Transitioning Tips Part 2

Amel Larrieux-one of my hair idols!

  This is a continuation of Part 1′s tips. So carrying on…

6. Learn how to do your hair girl!

In my honest opinion, there is no reason why any woman can have a legit excuse for not knowing how to do her hair. For those of you who are a slave to the salon so much so, that you have no knowledge of your own hair and how to do it….well, shame on you. Think of this period as a time where you can learn. The easiest and healthiest route for you hair is to blend your relaxed texture to match your new growth. Do braid outs, twist outs, or my personal favorite-bantu knot outs to help you achieve this. If done right, these styles won’t damage your hair and are aesthetically pleasing. Look to Youtube for tutorials. Then practice and eventually, you will get the hang of it. I can admit that when I was fully relaxed I didn’t really do much to my hair. I flat ironed it, curled it, ponytailed it, bunned it, blah blah, etc, etc..you know, the usual styles. But I have gotten the most compliments on my hair ever during this past year and I credit my new found styling creativity for that. Doing this has also saved me $$ and I can’t ever be mad at that!

I refuse to use this gunk any longer/pharmacypricer.com

7. Change your products

Okay so some transitioners claim that their hair still responds well to the products they have always used  since when they were relaxed. And if this is the case for you, then keep on using what works for you. Unfortunately, this is not the case for me. I refuse to put anything with petrolatum on my hair anymore…ugghh.. My transitioning hair demands alot more from me than when I was fully relaxed. And I thought my relaxed hair was a diva!  Here’s an analogy I’ve created for my hair:

• I like to think of my transitoning hair as two kids I have to take care of. My relaxed hair is my 17 year old teenager: I have experience raising it, it doesn’t have to be looked after much since it will be leaving the house soon (the house meaning my head, lol) but still needs guidance from time to time. My new growth on the other hand, is my 3 year old toddler: It loves to be babied, needs attention  and to be fed (water) constantly, and has a mind of its own. So when you have to take care of  the toddler and teen together it can be chaotic (understand?).

Your toddler is going to need more from you than your teen. Your teen may respond well to products with a clogging mineral oil ingredient, and you toddler may have a tantrum over it. So the best solution is to find something that works for both of them. Step your product game up. Check out online beauty stores like Curlmart, that have healthy products for your hair. Read the reviews. Then look on Youtube to see if there are any reviews on the products of your interest.  Maybe you made some mistakes when raising your teen in the past, but hey, at least you can learn from it so you can raise your toddler better!

8. Trim, trim, trim

It is vital that you come  to a point where you trim your hair every month. Trimming is important for transitioners because your hair in this state is liable to break off easier which means your ends will get a bit raggedy or uneven. Trimming your hair often is a good way of preventing this. If you don’t, then any raggedy or split end you have will travel up the hair shaft and can reach your new growth and split that too! So trim. I started trimming around the 5 month-post relaxer mark and have done it every month since then. And quite honestly my hair hasn’t gotten drastically shorter, it is still the same length it was since then. Also, the less relaxed hair you have attached to your new growth, the easier your transition will be.

9. Release the expectations!! (Important!)

This has been one of the biggest challenges for me during my transition. Like stated in a previous post, I’ve cut random strands of my hair at the demarcation line, just to see what it looks like. The curiosity of wondering how my hair will look with the relaxed ends nixed, kills me sometimes (not enough to BC just yet,  but you catch my drift..lol). Even though which each day that passes, I know I’m getting closer to that big curly hair I’ve been dreaming of, I have to realize that my hair may not end up like some of the girls in the pictures I look to as inspiration. It will never, ever look like Taren 916  or Amel Larrieux (I love their hair) and I have to accept that. Who knows how my hair will turn out? This unknown freaks me out sometimes because I don’t want to have blind expectations of what my hair will be just because I want it to be a certain way. So I think of this transitioning process not only being for my hair, but for me to get acclimated to a mindset more accepting of whatever my hair will become. So with that being said…

10. BC when YOU want to

I am inspired when I look on a forum or blog and see that someone has BCed. Sometimes the inspiration creates more of an urge to BC. But I am going to do it when I’m ready and you should too. Don’t let anyone pressure you, because at the end of the day YOU have to do your hair everyday, NOT them. This may sound dumb, but the last thing that I want is to BC and regret the time that I do it. I would rather feel the liberating, freeing experience like others, than being consumed by thoughts of wishing I would’ve waited. The way I see it, after BCing I plan to be natural until I die, so what’s the rush?  I will do it when I’m good and ready…and ladies, you should too!

Random Thought:My Friends

It’s interesting how most of my really good friends are people who I either did not like, or thought were weird when I first met them.

Long Term Transitioning Tips Part 1

hairecstacy.blogspot.com

I am by no means a “pro” when it comes to transitioning from a relaxer to natural. Shoo, I haven’t even seen my hair fully natural since I was 6 or so.

But after a year of this madness, I have finally come to a point where I am understanding of both textures collectively. I feel like I have paid my dues to the transitioning gods and now I can give others advice on how to be successful in this whole process. 

So for those of you out there that are currently (or are aspiring to), doing a long-term transition without adding weave or extensions here are my tips in no particular order. Take notes my little pupils!

1.Halt all trips to the Dominican salon

Yes this is the one place you can walk in with your hair jacked up and  without an appointment and walk out whipping your hair back and forth like you’re in a Pantene Pro-V commercial for just $18 bucks. But let’s keep it real ladies. We know they put too much heat on our hair. Having tears stream out of your eyes as the blow dryer is aimed at your scalp with a hotter than hell setting is a sign…. and yes I am speaking from experience. Not only that, the rigorous rubbing of the shampoo on your scalp can’t be good. Not to mention the fact that they probably aren’t going to take the time needed to detangle your hair effectively. Imagine them raking their comb carelessly from root to tip through your hair, while being 8 months post relaxer with 4 inches of new growth connected to 6 inches of relaxed hair. ouuccch…Uh yeah there’s a reason why you’re in and out within an hour…Just say no Mami!

2. Find what your hair likes

This transitioning time is not time just used for stalling until you are ready to do the Big Chop. This is your time to learn what your hair likes and dislikes. Likes and dislikes meaning products to use,  how to build your regimen, and what styles are best during this process. Your transitioning hair may not like  the same products that your fully relaxed hair liked. You may will have to change how you wash and detangle your hair. You will have to moisturize more. You won’t get this chance to learn your texture if you weave your hair up all the time. You also won’t learn anything about your hair if you get it pressed or flat ironed consistently. Which brings me to my next point…

3. Do not consistently flat iron your hair

I know this seems like the easiest way to transition. The first time I transitioned, this is how I thought I had to do it. But after 8 months and inches of new growth, I got so fed up with forcing my hair to do something it didn’t want to do, that I went back to the relaxer. So you see where that got me. Consistent flat ironing, pressing and blow drying your hair at high heat levels not only damages your hair, but can damage your natural curl pattern. I’ve seen it before. A few of my friends transitioned this route and ended up with a head full of curly hair and stick straight sections of hair in the most random places. And the only way to get rid of those heat damaged strands? To cut them off. So if you plan on straightening your hair during this time, do not make a habit out of it.

4.  Moisturize, moisturize, and repeat

Our relaxed hair needs moisture naturally. But when you are transitioning, you need even more. Natural hair craves h20 and our relaxed hair doesn’t necessarily, so you will have to find a balance in how to distribute moisture properly to both textures. I can’t stress this tip enough, and it’s still something I am working on achieving myself. Use leave-ins post washing, and creamy moisturizers several times a week if not needed daily. Seal your ends with oils like jojoba, grape seed, or castor or butters like shea.

5. Have patience when detangling

Honestly I will say this is another main factor that went into me not transitioning completely the first time around. I was so fed up with detangling and how much longer it took than when I was relaxed that I just said “Eff this.. I can’t take it any longer!”. If you find yourself getting to this point pay close attention to these two words that will save you:  smaller sections. Start detangling in smaller sections and even wash your hair in sections instead of all at the same time. Will it take longer? Probably. But it will save you time and frustration when it comes to detangling and you won’t lose as much hair than if you were to not do it this way. Devote enough time to detangling your hair so that you are never rushed. Here’s some more hair saving pointers for this crucial tip:

• use a WIDE tooth comb (I wouldn’t suggest a brush unless it’s a Denman) that is preferably seamless
• detangle from the bottom (ends) to the top (root) slowly
• be careful around the demarcation line or else your hair will break off
• if you choose to not detangle in the shower, do it immediately after you get out, keeping a spray bottle of water handy for when you need to re-wet the hair as it’s drying , and applying a leave-in before hand (Kimmaytube is what I use)
• if you detangle in the shower, make sure your hair is wet and full of conditoner
• be PATIENT! It’s the only way you will get through detangling successfully

Stay tuned for Part 2…